Fat, sick, and more-than-nearly dehydrated

New blog time, bitches!

I don’t particularly have a lot to say right now, but have a ton of GIFs saved with blog stuff in mind.

This isn’t one of them, it’s just amazing.

Anyway, so… what’s been going on since the last post?  Well, I’ve been sick for WEEKS now.

I had gone to the doctor for one of my weekly check-ins and was starting to feel like I was starting to get a cold the night before.  I was told I had an upper respiratory infection and that it’d last a couple of weeks.

Uh huh, whatever doc, I have a small cold.  I’ll power right through it.

WRONG!

So the cold ended up getting worse and I was fairly positive that I had pneumonia.  I was scared that all of the coughing was going to be bad for my new innards.  I knew I was somewhat dehydrated, so I figured that hitting up the ER wouldn’t hurt… get some fluids, check out my lungs, whatever.  So I get to the ER and I’m like CRAZY winded walking in the door.  I get put into a room almost immediately and they were treating me like I’m bleeding out or something.  Hooking me up to all this equipment, asking me a million frantic questions, and getting me into a hospital gown right in front of them (usually I’m given privacy, whatever, nothing they haven’t seen before).  They checked my pulse and blood pressure and were like “Uhhhhh yeah we should put her in the next room”.  Apparently I was CRAZY dehydrated and my heart rate was 180, so they put me in the room with the extra equipment in case I dropped dead or whatever.  Rad.

After multiple attempts, they were able to get an IV placed and got my starting to re-hydrate.  They gave me 3 or 4 bags of fluid, but my pulse still raced any time I moved!  They did a portable chest x-ray, no pneumonia that they saw.  The meds they gave me to stop coughing didn’t really help and I seriously couldn’t blow my nose without making the heart monitor start beeping, so they decided to admit me to the hospital and see if they could stabilize things.

One of the good things about this hospitalization is that I basically HAVE to eat something.  If I’m home alone and don’t feel up to it, I don’t bother.  But in the hospital, there’s a menu and a feeding schedule (lol like you can only get breakfast certain hours and stuff) and people coming in constantly to make sure you’re doing what you’re supposed to.  Now, this menu was not bariatric or veg-friendly, really.  My first meal was a scoop of (friggin incredible) mashed potatoes and a small fruit cup.  I had scrambled eggs with salsa and a side of fruit for breakfast, snacked on raw veggies and salad dressing throughout the day, and generally skipped dinner because the snacking filled me up.  I felt the best after breakfast, probably because I got a bit of protein.

I was in the hospital for three days.  They never officially figured out what was wrong with me (whether it was the flu or what) and by the time I was discharged, I honestly felt worse.  I knew I was still dehydrated (I had about 7 total bags of fluids, they had it dripping SUPER slow to keep my veins from exploding), they had found I was allergic to a certain antibiotic, I had the worst migraine I can recall ever having, and I gained like five pounds while I was there because of the re-hydrating.

I wonder if I had just stuck with the natural methods of getting healthy, if I would’ve felt better faster.

I’ve been coughing and junk for a few days short of a month now.

I had another appointment with my doctor about a week later.  I knew I was dehydrated but really felt pretty much okay, aside from being sick.  My heart rate was still up and they asked me if I’ve been drinking water.

I explained that it is physically impossible for me to drink what is expected of me.  (I’m not even being a spoiled brat or anything right now, it seriously doesn’t work for me!)  Anyway, they decided I needed another freaking IV.  They tried three times into the office, without the numbing shot.  OW!!!  Then I sat in a room alone for an hour while they tried to figure out what to do next.  I tried to learn some German on Duolingo for distraction.  I ended up getting sent to the Urgent Care clinic, got two more IV pokes before getting a winner.  They could only give me 3 bags of fluid and people KEPT coming in asking I was feeling better as it was going on.  I felt exactly the same.  What were they expecting?

No. It doesn’t work like that for me.  Maybe after like, 20 bags.  So no, I still walk around like a friggin zombie.

My heart can’t keep up with the lack of hydration and nutrition.  I can walk on the treadmill on occasion, but standing still just kills me.  I’m so weak in the shower that I end up on my hands and knees.

I appear to be losing a bit of weight again, though.  I need to measure my inches, because clothes aren’t fitting anymore.

This was totally me on Superbowl Sunday:

I’ve gotta retire the jeans I was wearing, they aren’t working for me anymore.  For the time being, it’s gonna be all pajamas and gym clothes.

I’m getting an MRI on Monday morning to check out my abdomen and I see my doctor again later this month.  Hopefully things will be better by then?

Oh, hey, I made an Instagram account for Done being big, go check it out.

Thanks for your support, everyone!

Eleven pounds down

I haven’t been very good with updating this.  I’m having a hard time in my personal life, but I have been getting to the gym still.  Yesterday I got in with my trainer for a quick weigh in and journal swap, and I had lost 6 more pounds.  So now I’m weighing in at 306.  I’m glad to have made progress, but feel like I should be farther by now.

I have a head cold, so food sounds gross.  I had no appetite last week, and now I cant taste anything.  Could bode well for me.

My feet HURT from walking last night.  I went almost three miles in bad shoes – I just kept going cause I was into it.  Got my first workout blister though… haha.

Training Day 1

Today I began officially with a trainer. I really cannot afford this, but in the grand scheme of things, I can/have to. It’s $199 for five 1-hour sessions, but she’s splitting it into ten 30-minute sessions, probably twice a month. My trainer (let’s call her “K”) also decided that once a week, I will meet her for a few minutes to swap out food journals and get a weekly weigh in going. Very glad for that, as I can’t find a consistent scale to save my life. (Tonight the locker room scale said 314, but I could go again tomorrow and it’ll be way more or less) K started me out doing these squats where you hold straps out in front of you and then start to sit down. I did three sets of 10. I like those, I can tell I’m doing something without killing myself. Next (I think, I’ve already blocked it out haha) I did something horrible called “lay down, stand up”. It’s just what it sounds like, lay down flat on your back, then get back up. We were in a room with a padded floor, but I required extra padding. I really struggled with these. My weight made it hard enough, but all that extra use with my right knee and hip kinda sucked. Maybe like three or four in, my left leg was rendered useless. It is much more weak, and I simply couldn’t get it to cooperate. I think I only did like five of these, as opposed to the 30 K had set out to do. That had me breathing really hard. Probably should’ve brought my inhaler. After that, we stood against the wall with one of those exercise balls, and I just barely pushed the ball against the wall with my leg. Did that ten times, switched to the other leg, and again. Those were difficult, but doable. I had to stop a few times for water, I was starting to see spots. The next exercise was what I called the “thighmaster”. I stood on either side of the ball and gently squeezed, then released. 3 sets of ten there as well. I’m very uncoordinated, and my legs fought me with that one. Finally, I did an oldie from physical therapy. Laying flat on my back, lift a leg up, back down, and switching. These were difficult because I kept getting a Charlie horse as I lifted. We sat on the floor for a couple of minutes and talked about my plan for the week, and that was it! My face was red and sweaty, but I didn’t feel like that was enough of a workout (since I REALLY didn’t want to come, I felt I needed to do more to make the trip worth it), so I got on a treadmill. I only went for 22 minutes (mostly at 2 MPH) because my left side, left outer thigh, and the left side of my low back were unhappy. Tomorrow morning I will see the doctor to check in on my back, as it has been acting up more lately, and I really need it to comply so I can get this damn weight off!

Oh, also, I told my ex (long story, but we’re close) about my goal. I showed him my main inspiration picture:

and he said “Wow if you looked like that your craziness would be kinda sexy” – I only properly read that just now, and now I can’t tell if he was being a jerk or nice. Anyway, it felt good to tell him what I was planning for, he was with me at my highest weight and during “the great weight loss of ’05”, where I lost like 30 pounds pretty much never getting off my ass and strictly eating potatoes (generally frozen) and binging on like cake frosting and stuff. There would be days when I was super thirsty and there was nothing in the house to drink (I was convinced that tap water would make me sick) and all I could find would be a Mike’s raspberry in the back of the fridge. Classy stuff. Anyway, so now pretty much all the important people in my life know what’s up and can keep me focused on the goal. Hopefully. My mom keeps buying me junk, I don’t know what else to say to get that to stop. Speaking of stopping, enough with this blog entry, damn.

*I do not currently have a link handy for the picture of the chick. I saved it months ago off of Pinterest, I forget if there was a website attached to it or not. I am not trying to claim credit.
**I posted this last night, I guess it didn’t go through!

Do I have to do this daily?

I woke up with a lot of low back pain. I didn’t really have anything going on, so I went back to sleep. Slept most of the day away. I got up and moved around some and my back was still being a dick, so I decided I wouldn’t hit the gym today. I tried making a pizza/flatbread beast with Trader Joe’s pizza dough… it turned out horrid but I kept eating. At like 6:40 I decided I may as well go to the gym. I like to go at 7 PM so I can watch The Office. (Scheduling my workouts around TV… a true lazy girl through and through) So I got there at 7:01. I was full of bread and feeling blah, so I only went the half hour instead of an hour. I feel like crap for not pushing through. I’m trying to tell myself that just doing something is what matters.

Now my feet hurt

Close to 2

The treadmill stopped me at 60 minutes, is that normal? I wanted to get to two miles, haha. I wasn’t especially energized or anything, I just went slow and zoned in on watching The Office. I love that the treadmill has a tv. I kinda wanted to work my upper body some, but really don’t know how to use the equipment. I’ll do some wall push-ups when I get home.